Snake: Who is that?
Otacon: You don't know? That's Scott Pilgrim.
Snake: Is it an unwritten rule that everyone here has to have a lame name?
Otacon: I don't think you should be saying that so loud.
Otacon: I heard that he has a flaming sword that can turn people into coins with one blow. I also heard that he has a devastating 64-hit combo that can hurt you a lot, and really quickly, too.
Snake: That's not very promising.
Otacon: Well, don't be scared of him! He can probably sense fear!
Snake: Whoa, that's some flashy hair.
Mei Ling: I heard she colors her hair every week and a half.
Snake: Really? That sounds fickle and impulsive.
Mei Ling: Yes, but I wouldn't say that to her face. Ramona Flowers has some battle scars and she is very pretty to boot.
Snake: Kind of like you, Mei Ling?
Mei Ling: (giggles) I'm being hit on by Solid Snake again? Well, I also wouldn't hit her in front of Scott Pilgrim. As far as I know, they're dating.
Snake: So now everyone that has a lame name is dating?
Snake: What a geek.
Colonel: Snake, you're in trouble now.
Colonel: Some people think Gideon is just a record dealer, but he is a crafty swordsman as well. He is one of the Seven Deadly Exes of Ramona Flowers.
Snake: No wonder she dumped him. He actually has a pretty interesting name.
Colonel: Watch out for his pixel bullets and double swords. He killed the great Scott Pilgrim until he came back to life.
Snake: Anything else?
Colonel: I also heard that when Scott Pilgrim and Knives Chau doubled up on him, they barely beat him. He also takes a lot of time to defeat once you've got him.
Snake: Whatever you say, Colonel.
(Knives coming soon)